Get the skinny on that cleanse (2024)

Every year, every month, and every diet, I do the same thing. I come up with a plan, I do everything I need to do to prepare for that plan, and it works, until it doesn’t. This year, I intended to “start fresh” with three cleanses or quick diets: the cabbage soup diet, the taco diet, and a juice cleanse.

So, before reading my reviews, I just wanted to state the obvious. I may have tried just about every diet in the book, but I am in no way or (physical) shape, an expert, and this is not expert advice.

To people who may not have struggled with weight loss, this all may seem very silly, and we should all just “eat healthy and exercise.” But to those of us who experience our weight as a daily struggle, these “silly” cleanses may look like the light at the end of a tunnel.

The Cabbage Soup Diet

What: You can eat as much cabbage soup as you want, plus other foods that are allotted within that day of the week (for example, day one you can also eat fruit, except bananas).

More info: http://www.cabbage-soup-diet.com/

Pros: Lose weight quickly, no portion control needed, I actually really like the taste of the soup.

Cons: The soup is not very filling so it’s likely you’ll feel hunger and it’s likely you’ll gain the weight back VERY quickly.

Thoughts: So, I admit it. This is my “old faithful.” While I wouldn’t recommend as a “diet” I think is a good solution for a wedding, or one night event, that you need to fit into a dress that is one size too small. And, I did actually feel lighter, and “cleansed” afterward, which is pretty much the point, I guess.

The Taco Diet

What: So, this one is a little odd and needs a backstory. About a month ago, I read this article about a woman, Kaylin Pound, who ate nothing but tacos for six days and lost four pounds. She did it as kind of a joke after a woman ate nothing but pizza for a week and lost weight, too.

This was the inspiration behind my “taco cleanse,” but then I realized something crazy has happened since then. Taco cleanses are a big thing, like a really big deal–books, websites, the whole nine yards. There is even one version devoted to only vegan tacos! But, I did my taco diet like Kaylin Pound, who was my original inspiration and ate only standard tacos.

More info: SO MUCH, just Google it.

Pros: Tacos… Do I really need to say more? But really, tacos are basically a well rounded meal–a protein, carb, dairy & veggie. So, they’re filling, and delicious.

Cons: Too much of a great thing is never a good thing.

Thoughts: The results of this “test” were very inconclusive. It’s totally not the diet for me, but could be for you! I actually only lasted one day on the taco diet and I got hot, sweaty, extremely thirsty, and had to lay down for a few hours right after work. I don’t know for sure that it was the tacos, but after I stopped eating them, I felt normal, and wasn’t willing to try it again the next day.

The Juice Cleanse

I’m not going to lie, after the taco diet, I was feeling pretty gross, and had no will to start another “cleanse.” So, now I am reflecting on a juice cleanse I did for one day during the summer pre-beach trip.

What: I didn’t follow a very specific cleanse, but I basically made a variation of one of these “green smoothies” pictured in this infographic for every meal. I don’t actually have a Vitamix, this was just something I had seen on Pinterest at the time.

Pros: I felt lighter and 5% more confident in a bathing suite.

Cons: I didn’t enjoy the taste, and I was SO hungry.

Thoughts: I think most people who have tried a cleanse have tried a juice cleanse. I mean, it’s just fruits and veggies, so it makes you feel just like a cleanse theoretically should. But, felt like I was choking down baby food, ew.

Overall thoughts:

I cannot tell you the amount of hours I have spent looking up diet trends, cleanse reviews, and weight loos tips. But, I can tell you not a single hour was worth it. I’ve tried many diets revolving around low carb, or low calorie, plans. And, they worked until they didn’t. This year, I decided to pursue a lifestyle change (yes, I joined the Oprah bandwagon and, so far, so good), but for me, it’s always going to be a work in progress. But, if you’re getting ready to cleanse, diet, or pursue an alternate weight loss path, I don’t want you to think I am discouraging these options. This is just a summary of my personal experiences within the past few weeks. And, whatever your New Year’s resolution may be, I wish you the best of luck!

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Get the skinny on that cleanse (1)

Get the skinny on that cleanse (2024)
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